I might be able to use the first part of this in my thesis, but the ramblings about eternal damnation might not be relevant to my research question.

I expected affection specifically expected affection that deals with the occult or something supernatural bleeding into our reality, can be an inherently philosophical genre. it's an interesting genre because you don't need to understand the philosophical forces behind it to enjoy the sort of superficial trappings of the adventure. but it becomes philosophical when you have a story of one reality bleeding into another because it draws attention to the edges of how we understand our reality in an accessible format. specifically the area of speculative fiction that involves the fantastic bleeding into the mundane, the discovery of the higher plane and its consequences. I'm sure a lot of this comes from my own religious upbringing, which comes with a preoccupation that there is a secret layer that we can't see that exists not above but inside everything, and it's mechanics have real, and often terrifying consequences, even for those who are not aware of these systems. I've always found with my work that I'm always trying to say these complicated things about how I understand the world - whether I'm drawing attention to my own philosophical understanding or fears, or building metaphors for my own realities - so far I'm not very good at communicating and drawing attention to those ideas and make it buried in genre trappings. which is fine as long as people can still appreciate the adventure - but I would like to become skilled enough that people can see me and what I mean. it's nice to write a research paper so that I can talk about the ideas that aren't coming through. like telling a joke and then spending 5 minutes explaining it - that makes it a good joke right?

"God is Love" is often what gets stitched into pillows, but many of us raised in religious tradition,especially the weirdos and the queers, relate a lot more to "God is Wrath." Depending on your sect there may be mystical mechanisms available for salvation, but in mine at least their was the potential to be born eternally damned.

These characters, at least initially, engage with these celestial mechanics with optimism that it will liberate them in some way - Linus believes he'll talk to God, Rebecca believes some kind of power will be granted, RM comes to believe there is some kind of scientific truth to be discovered, and Freddie speculates on the quantum aspects - each interpreting the events through the lens of their own time periods and inclinations.

I'm attempting to capture my own discomfort in seeing other people drawn in and comforted by something I find inherently dangerous and inescapable. I want to simulate this dread in the player, and have them need to keep playing anyway, even as they learn it will probably hurt them. Even if you avoid the trap and stop playing, the knowledge that it exists and can get through should stay with you. I can insist intellectually I'm not doomed, having no evidence of the magic leak that proves it, and live my life without the consideration of celestial mechanics - but that doesn't mean they're not there, and that they won't catch up with me eventually.